My Painful (But Funny) Story of Investing in Gold, Stocks, and ETFs

Two nights ago, I sat in my quiet home office in Lagos, staring at the glowing screen of my trading app, the charts for Investing in Gold, Stocks, and ETFs flickering like old friends who sometimes lie to you.

After more than ten years grinding in this game—starting from scratch with a small salary back in 2015—I thought I had seen it all. The crashes, the euphoric bull runs, the moments I almost lost everything because I got greedy.

“This time feels different,” I muttered to myself, sipping bitter black coffee. Gold had been on a tear—up over 25% that year alone—while my tech stocks were wobbling from some global uncertainty, and my broad-market ETFs like the ones tracking the S&P were flat.

I had built a nice balanced portfolio: 40% in solid stocks, 30% in diversified ETFs, and the rest in gold as my safety net. Classic diversification, right? That’s what all the experts preach when you’re investing in gold, stocks, and ETFs.

But lately, doubt crept in. Friends kept texting me screenshots of gold charts skyrocketing. One buddy, Tunde, called me late one evening.

“Guy, why are you still holding those volatile stocks? Gold is the real deal now. No drama, just steady shine. I just loaded up on a gold ETF—easy entry, no storage wahala.”

I laughed it off. “Tunde, gold doesn’t pay dividends. It just sits there looking pretty. My stocks give me income even when the market sleeps. And ETFs? They let me own pieces of hundreds of companies without picking winners.”

He wasn’t convinced. “You dey talk like professor. Me, I just want sleep at night knowing my money no dey dance azonto with inflation.”

I hung up, but his words stuck. Maybe I was missing something. That night, I decided to tilt harder toward gold. I sold off some underperforming stocks—a couple of energy plays that got hit by policy changes—and moved the cash into more physical-backed gold ETFs.

I even bought a few extra ounces of actual gold coins from a trusted dealer in Ikeja, feeling that heavy, reassuring weight in my palm under the desk lamp. The yellow metal gleamed like it was winking at me: “I’ve protected people for centuries, bro. Relax.”

The next few weeks were bliss. Gold kept climbing. Every morning I’d check the app and smile—my portfolio looked healthier than it had in months. I started bragging a little on family WhatsApp group. “See why investing in gold, stocks, and ETFs smartly beats just chasing hype?” My cousin Ada replied with fire emojis: “Uncle, teach us o! You be guru.”

Then came the Friday everything flipped.

I was at a small gathering in Victoria Island, networking with other investors over pepper soup and cold drinks. A guy I barely knew, Emeka, pulled me aside near the balcony overlooking the lagoon lights twinkling on the water.

“You hear about the new regulation?” he whispered, eyes wide.

“What regulation?”

He showed me his phone—news alert: sudden policy shift on commodity taxes, plus whispers of central bank moves flooding the market with supply to stabilize currencies. Gold plunged 8% in after-hours trading. Not a dip—a cliff.

My stomach dropped. I excused myself, rushed home, and opened the app with shaky hands. Sure enough, my gold ETFs had tanked, wiping out months of gains in hours.

The physical coins? Still heavy, but now worth less on paper. My stocks and ETFs? Barely moved—they were bouncing back already on bargain hunting.

I sat there in the dark, screen glow lighting my face, feeling like a fool. All those years of experience, and I let FOMO pull me into over-allocating to gold right at the peak. Classic beginner mistake dressed up in veteran clothes.

The next morning, hungover from regret more than drinks, I called Tunde.

“Guy, you were right about the shine… but wrong about timing,” I admitted.

He chuckled. “We all chase the glitter sometimes. But remember, gold is insurance, not the whole house. Your stocks and ETFs are the engine.”

I rebuilt slowly. Sold some gold at a loss to rebalance, bought back into quality stocks on the dip, and kept my ETFs humming with regular contributions.

The twist? That painful correction taught me more than any winning streak ever did. Gold saved me during past crashes—it’s done its job—but when I tried to make it the star instead of the supporting actor, it reminded me who’s boss.

Now, when people ask me about investing in gold, stocks, and ETFs, I tell them my story straight—no textbook vibes, just real scars.

“Diversify like your life depends on it,” I say, “because one day, it might. Gold for protection, stocks for growth, ETFs for ease. But never fall in love with any one of them. They all break your heart eventually… until they don’t.”

And somewhere in my safe, those gold coins still sit—quiet, shiny, waiting for the next storm. But I don’t stare at them every day anymore. I’ve learned my lesson the hard, human way.