Okafor’s Law: The Law That Says “Sex Once, Sex Always?”

Okafor’s Law is a provocative concept that has sparked curiosity, debate, and even legal battles since it entered popular discourse. Rooted in Nigerian pop culture, it’s a term that blends urban folklore, romantic theorizing, and cinematic drama.

Okafor’s Law is a Nigerian cultural concept that posits: “Once a man has been intimate with a woman, he can be intimate with her again at any time, regardless of circumstances, provided the initial experience was memorable, simply put Once debe always debe.”

The idea suggests that a strong first impression—particularly in the bedroom—creates a lasting connection that can be rekindled at will, even if the relationship has ended, the woman is married, or years have passed.

The term is often framed as a “law” of romantic or sexual dynamics, but its validity is hotly debated. Some view it as a humorous observation of human behaviour, while others criticize it as a sexist myth that undermines consent and agency. Its catchy, pseudo-scientific phrasing, sometimes expressed as “C1 + P = C∞” (where C1 is the initial encounter, P is proper performance, and C∞ is infinite future access), adds to its allure as a topic of discussion.

The origins of Okafor’s Law are unclear, with no clear historical figure named Okafor associated with its creation. It’s likely a piece of Nigerian urban folklore, possibly emerging from university circles or street slang, where it gained traction as a tongue-in-cheek “rule” about relationships.

The term predates its cinematic adaptation, as noted in online discussions and blogs, but it was the 2016 Nollywood film Okafor’s Law that catapulted it into mainstream consciousness. The “law” is often linked to a Yoruba street slang, “Once debe is always debe,” implying that once a connection is established, it persists.

Its pseudo-scientific framing, complete with a formula, has led some to treat it as a hypothesis ripe for debate, with variables like marital status, opportunity, or financial status potentially affecting its outcome.

The concept gained widespread attention through the 2016 Nigerian romantic comedy-drama Okafor’s Law, written, directed, and produced by Omoni Oboli. The film stars Blossom Chukwujekwu as Chuks (nicknamed “Terminator”), a charismatic ladies’ man who believes in the Law’s infallibility.

Challenged by his friends to prove it, Chuks bets he can re-seduce three ex-girlfriends—Ify (Ufuoma McDermott), Tomi (Toyin Abraham), and Ejiro (Omoni Oboli)—within 21 days, despite their changed circumstances (e.g., engagements or career shifts). The film blends humour, romance, and drama to explore whether Chuks can uphold the “law” or if it’s just a myth.

Critics noted that while the film had comedic moments, it struggled with inconsistent chemistry among the leads and uneven pacing. Gabriel Afolayan’s performance as one of the friends stood out, but Toyin Abraham’s portrayal was criticized for being overly stiff.

Despite mixed reviews, the film succeeded in sparking conversations about relationships and gender dynamics, making Okafor’s Law a cultural touchstone. You can stream Okafor’s Law on platforms like Amazon Prime Video, where it’s described as a test of the Law’s validity over a 21-day period.

The release of Okafor’s Law at the 2016 Toronto International Film Festival was marred by a legal battle. Writer Jude Idada accused Omoni Oboli and her production company, Dioni Visions, of intellectual property theft, claiming he wrote the screenplay in 2014 and registered it with the Canadian Guild of Writers in January 2015.

Idada alleged that Oboli accessed his script through Filmone, a co-defendant in the case, after he shared it with them in 2015 for a potential co-production. When Filmone terminated their agreement, Idada claimed they shared the script with Oboli, who produced the film without crediting or compensating him.

Idada’s team presented evidence, including a copy of his screenplay and a purchase agreement that assigned the copyright to Raconteur Productions. Oboli, however, claimed she wrote her own screenplay in 2016 but failed to provide drafts or other evidence to support this in court. The dispute led to a court injunction on March 24, 2017, halting the film’s premiere and screenings.

The injunction was lifted on March 30, 2017, due to insufficient evidence to justify a continued suspension, allowing the film to hit theatres on March 31. The case remains unresolved, with potential box office earnings possibly subject to damages if Idada’s claims are upheld.

This controversy raised questions about copyright in Nollywood, where ideas are often shared informally, and the line between inspiration and theft can be blurry. The case also highlighted the importance of protecting creative work and the challenges of proving ownership in a collaborative industry.

Okafor’s Law has become a lightning rod for discussions about relationships, gender, and ethics. Its central claim—that a man can always return to a former partner—has divided opinions. Some argue the Law has merit, particularly if the initial encounter was exceptional.

They suggest that emotional or physical connections can persist, making it easier to rekindle intimacy. A 2020 Zikoko article quoted a man who called it “more accurate than the laws of physics,” citing the scarcity of satisfying sexual experiences for women as a reason they might return to a skilled ex.

Others note that nostalgia and unresolved feelings can make the Law feel real, especially in vulnerable moments, such as breakups or lonely nights. Many, especially women, dismiss Okafor’s Law as a sexist myth that promotes entitlement and undermines consent.

Critics argue it reduces women to objects of desire, ignoring their agency, moral values, or current relationships. A 2022 article by Document Women quoted women who called the law “rapey” and rooted in rape culture, emphasizing that personal growth and boundaries should override past connections.

The Law also fails to account for diverse sexual orientations or asexual individuals, further limiting its applicability. Some propose a gender-neutral version, suggesting that both men and women might be drawn back to exes if the past experience was memorable and circumstances align.

However, critics argue that this still oversimplifies human behaviour, ignoring factors such as emotional maturity, ethical considerations, or new commitments. The Law’s ethical implications are significant. It can perpetuate harmful stereotypes, such as the notion that “good sex” gives a man perpetual access to a woman’s body, disregarding her autonomy.

Stories of exes feeling entitled to rekindle intimacy, as shared in personal accounts, highlight how the Law can foster unhealthy expectations.

The truth of Okafor’s Law depends on perspective. For some, it captures a kernel of truth about human attraction and nostalgia, where past chemistry can resurface under the right conditions. A Pulse Nigeria article estimated that 7 out of 10 women might consider re-engaging with a skilled ex, and 4 might act on it, especially if subsequent partners haven’t matched the experience. However, the Law’s deterministic framing is its biggest flaw.

Human relationships are complex, influenced by numerous variables—such as emotional growth, life changes, and personal values—that the Law oversimplifies. Critics argue it’s less a universal truth and more a reflection of specific scenarios where opportunity and lingering feelings align.

Scientific or not, its popularity as a conversation starter is undeniable, fueling podcasts, social media debates, and late-night chats.

Okafor’s Law is more than just a catchy phrase—it’s a cultural phenomenon that blends humour, controversy, and introspection.

From its murky origins in Nigerian slang to its cinematic exploration in Omoni Oboli’s 2016 film, it has sparked debates about relationships, consent, and creativity. The legal battle over the film’s screenplay spotlights the challenges of protecting intellectual property in Nollywood, while the Law itself raises thorny questions about gender dynamics and human behaviour.

Whether you see it as a playful hypothesis or a problematic stereotype, Okafor’s Law has left an unforgettable mark on pop culture.

It’s a reminder that love, sex, and relationships are never as simple as a formula—and that’s what keeps the conversation alive. So, the next time you hear someone mention Okafor’s Law, ask yourself: is it a law, a myth, or just a spicy slice of modern folklore?